Although I was planning on it, no beach this weekend.   Instead, in addition to some friend time yesterday enjoying a New England autumn,  it was a good weekend indoors.  Now that the days are getting darker, I finally took care of the lighting situation in the studio and replaced the overhead with daylight bulbs.  

On Saturday, another painter from my art crit group headed to Horseneck beach to paint on location.  I haven't painted outdoors since 1996.  That is, other than a day or two last fall in Provincetown.  But that doesn't really count because I was painting from the deck of where I was staying.

I love painting outdoors but had stopped because I tend to get freaked out and nervous when people watch or ask questions.  I freeze and it becomes difficult to paint.  I wish I could be at ease when I work outdoors.  I fully understand the curiosity and would love to encourage conversation and questions.  But it's tough for me to do while I'm painting.

Here are a couple shots of Horseneck beach.

Yesterday I was super-excited to paint. I hadn't felt that in months and instead have been pushing myself into the studio. Although I've had happy moments while painting, I haven't felt that exuberant drive since last February and was silently worrying about whether I really was a painter.

I know that the timing lined up with needing to get serious about finding work, and then moving to a new apartment.  I know that stress can affect my drive to paint.  But, I also do believe, as a Mentor once told me...it's been winter in my garden. Everything is cyclical.

Also, I think my time at the ocean on Sunday helped.   It's an important part of my self-care.

Yesterday after work, I walked home and didn't even stop to grab food but went right into the studio.   It felt SO good.

Photo from Sunday at the beach.

bI've been searching for a good beach so I can go for very long walks.  Last weekend I hit Narragansett and it was nice, but wasn't quite what I was looking for.   Over the summer, I've hit various beaches and realized that for playing in the water, Scarborough was my favorite.

One beach I'd yet to step on, although would hit the beach next to it, was Horseneck Beach.   Yesterday I finally checked it out.  It's exactly what I've been seeking for out of season beach going.  

It's a vast beach so I can easily do a 2 hour walk.   There are lots of waves so it feels like the wild New England ocean, not the bay.  It has dunes.   There are tidal marshes before the beach (which brought tears to my eyes when I saw them).  And it's only a 1/2 hour from home.   When I used to live on the NH coast, I used to drive to Ogunquit on Sunday afternoons to walk the massive beach.  And since I've returned to New England, I've really been missing that experience.   So I'm thrilled that I found the perfect beach. 

It's been like a Goldilocks experience.

I can't believe so much time has passed since my last entry.  Not only have I been busy, but quite consumed.   Job hunting is rough in this economy...and I've noticed it's been sapping my emotional strength.  So much so, that I have to force myself into the studio each week.

I began a new painting this weekend and here is a first capture.  Still in progress.  From "Beach" series.  acrylic on canvas.  22"x28"

When life gets challenging, recalibration is needed.  During these times, the littlest things accomplished feel like huge achievements.  And they are.   After finally knocking off some of my "to do" list that I've been hesitant to complete, the very cool, cloudy weather gave me a yearning for spaghetti.  Making red sauce and sitting down to a hearty pasta dish with a glass of red is a perfect way to end the day.  

Featuring another painting for sale from my private collection.  This one is from the Beach series, oil on canvas, 28"x22", 2012

You can see all seven works at this link.

I went to Waterfire again on Saturday evening.   Although I loathe crowds and tend to keep away from most events where I have to push through the hordes, there's something about being near water, the fires, the air filled with the smell of burning wood, and surrounded by lots of happiness.  

With the increase of bad manners, massive snark, and downright nastiness that flood our social media outlets, I've been consciously seeking out arenas that hold joy.  And Waterfire has become one of those for me.

This time I was there fairly early and caught some of the performances at the park next to the canal.  That is where I took this photo.

Limited time only - sale from artist's personal collection!

Since I've moved, I've solidified the selection of paintings that would remain as part of my personal holding.  With plans never to sell, I've enjoyed seeing them every day.  Due to circumstances and the need to let go and create more space in my life, for a limited time, I am offering seven paintings for sale.  

See the work at gagnonart.blogspot.com/2013_08_01_archive.html#622200206000170180.

Contact me at gagnon60(at)gmail(dot)com with any questions or comments.  I take PayPal as well as checks and cash.  Please feel free to share the link with your friends and network.

Here is one of the paintings that I've never before shown.

Him and Me.

22"x28", oil on canvas.  2009

$600 +s/h

Thank you so much.

Tuesday evening I returned to AS220 for their open life drawing session.   It's become one of my fave Providence things to do.   A sample of what I worked on that night.

A new workspace. 

There's nothing like looking at the trees and feeling the breeze if I have to work on my computer.  My friend Matt gave me his little table last year and it normally sits in the kitchen. Being on wheels, for the last few weeks I've been rolling it into the studio for the times I need to do computer work.

Status report:

I'm still looking for a job.  I had two amazing interviews for two really great jobs and they were both supposed to contact me early this week with their decision.

This morning I found out I didn't get one of them.  This afternoon I didn't get the other.   And…this reality of living week to week is getting tiresome but clearly there is a life lesson contained within all this unknowningness.  It's about holding onto faith and reminding myself that my past does not define my future or my present.  

I've been pushing myself to paint every day in spite of the periodic anxiety that sets in regarding how I'm going to pay my bills.

Saturday I'm playing host for a surprise birthday party for two other artists.  Others are assisting with food and drink but they needed a place and I'm thrilled they asked.   It's my first big get together in my new home.  

I've been too tweaked out about the job sitch to focus on the two paintings of boys that I'm working on and so instead began working a beach painting. Here is the second painting of two boys.  They are my nephews, based on a photo from over 20 years ago.  Painting is 22" x 28", oil on canvas.

The beach painting has become a metaphor for my current state.  In painting the journey to the ocean I discovered I was lost.  Each day I'd return to the studio and would make less of a mess than the day before but still felt like I was painting in the dark.  It really feels like my life right now.  Painting still in progress, 30" x 40", oil on canvas.

This week I watched while the house next door was getting a new roof.

There are two days left to take advantage of sale prices on my Beach paintings!  Sale runs thru Saturday August 10.

I accept paypal as well as cash/checks.

This paintings is 12"x24", oil on canvas and is $250 + s/h.

You can see the remaining paintings at www.mariegagnon.com/for_sale.html

In addition to being at the ocean, one of my other happy places is attending open life drawing sessions. I make it a point of hitting the Spring St. studio when I'm in NYC but tonight I attended my first one in Providence at AS220.  Nicole, from my studio crit group joined me.  

It was awesome. Wonderful crowd. Excellent model and good space. It's work and yet drawing the figure from life brings me much joy and peace. Especially when it's not attached to a painting and I can just move my hand while seeing...with no expectations other than to be in the moment. Happy. Happy. Happy.

As well as being in a room full of others creating, what I also love about open life drawing sessions is that it is easier to give myself the freedom to just be...and not worry about creating a finished piece.  Tossing out the idea of perfection.  I attempt to do that in my studio, but it's more of a struggle.  With life drawing events, it's not something I even worry about.   I love the 30 sec, 1 min, 2 min poses.  But even when it's longer poses, 5, 10, 30 min...I just redraw over and over, attempting to keep it quick and loose.  Here is a some from last night.   For the last few years, I've also been intentionally using pen because you can't erase.  What you see is what you get.    And, at AS220, the gallery (where the drawing takes place) is next to their bar and restaurant. You can even bring the food & drink into the drawing session.  During a model break I was able to purchase a pear cider to bring back to my work table.  Kinda nice! 

This entry began with the intent of talking about my pretty fab leftovers from last night, which I purchased there, just before drawing.  Wild rice, tofu, slivered almonds, kale and lots of garlic all sauteed together.  It was cheap and there was enough to take home and have 2 extra meals.  So simple and quite good.  And now for dessert, I have a fresh mango that I cut up and is waiting for me.

My apartment gets great cross ventilation.  I love summer breezes.

10 days left to take advantage of sale prices on my beach paintings.  Sale good until August 10.

Go to: www.mariegagnon.com/for_sale.html for paintings and prices.

My friend Matt spend Saturday evening with me on...stopping on his way to the Cape.  After a wonderful sushi dinner, we went to Waterfire.  There was a full burn scheduled that evening and it was his first experience.  

The vibe at Waterfire is pretty great.  When you stop...and sit, really engaging with the burn (ignoring the crowds), it's magical and centering.

Here are a few photos from the evening.

I'm holding a special ONLINE sale of some recent paintings. These are from the "Beach" paintings, the first series since I returned to the east coast. It is a month long sale beginning July 9 and ends August 10. In addition to checks and cash, I've set up a PayPal account to facilitate credit card purchases. The available paintings are on my website at: http://www.mariegagnon.com/for_sale.html After 14 years in Seattle my return to New England has affirmed that its coastline is my home. Reintroducing myself to the dunes on the Cape and Martha’s Vineyard I knew this landscape would become my first east coast series. The series first began as a love letter to this magical landscape and an exercise in light, space and color. It still is, but over the last few months I’ve watched the substance behind the paintings take hold. In painting the dune path I am painting the artist’s journey. We know the ocean is over the crest yet it remains hidden as we climb the hot sands. It is a landscape with an ever changing personality: its calm and dramatic nature. A character of extremes, it can feel isolating and yet that space is full of emotion, of ideas, and of color. (series still in progress) Email me at gagnon60@gmail.com if interested.

in progress

How to paint in really hot weather? I normally don't. My body doesn't work well with major heat. But after a week and a half of not painting, I couldn't not work. Mornings are fairly comfortable. I place the fans on the west side (living room and painting studio) to bring in the cooler air and so was able to paint for a while yesterday morning before the room became unbearably warm. Still taking it slow and thoughtfully with this painting.  I first began this painting last fall and hadn't touched it until a few weeks ago.

I haven't worked in this fashion in over 15 years, having instead just painted fast, furious and emotionally. Now, I'm trying to balance the emotion with thinking through the painting. This morning was spent warming up the painting after the cooler and greener undertones and also working on smaller sections. I will need to go in and redraw but will wait for better weather when my head is clearer. Also, I am totally falling in love with this painting.  

"Her Boys" (still in progress) 24 x 24 in., oil on canvas

It's been a while since I've posted.  Have been busy with work (my temp job) and looking for a permanent gig, quickie trip to my parents, and still working on my new place.  

I turned down an opportunity to spend the weekend on Martha's Vineyard because I really needed to stay put, rest, catch up on some work and attempt to get back into a routine with my painting.  Although I love having my studio in my home again, I've discovered that it is a challenge to paint out of my home after 5 years of having a separate studio space with essentially no distractions.  It requires a discipline and so I'm working on it.

So I've had a good weekend and staying here has been the perfect decision but it doesn't mean that I'm not longing for some great beach time.  I'm totally overdue.  I may hit the beach after work one day.  We'll see.

In honor of Pride month, here are a couple photos photo taken this past week.  It was a sunny, beautiful day and then within 20 minutes, the sky turned dark, it poured, it stopped and then…a gorgeous double rainbow.